Getting clean is serious business in Costa Rica

 Instructions for cleaning a baby: 
1. Gather the dirty dishes from all over the house
2. Put them in the sink along with the other dirty dishes
3. Wash all dishes with funny soap bar (it's a cylindrical shaped detergent bar that gets mushy when wet)
4. Scrub down sink
5. There is no bathtub, also no hot water in kitchen sink, so baby must be bathed in the sink with water brought from the shower
6. Fill large bowl with hot water from shower and carry to kitchen sink
7. Mix with cold water so it's a perfect baby bathing temperature
8. Gather bath items, including but not limited to: rag for plugging the drain, baby soap, dry towel, plastic cup, dirty baby
9. Strip baby naked
10. Place baby in sink
11. Use plastic cup to rinse baby
12. Lather baby with shampoo and create adorable hairstyle
13. Squeeze those irresistible chubby thighs
14. Make sure to wash under armpits and neck chub to remove all gooey build-up
15. Rince, Dry, and Kiss

Instructions for washing dirty clothes 
1. Wash the washing machine because it's been outside for a while
2. Plug it into the wall and make sure the drain goes into the rock pit in the back yard
3. Procure a large bucket and fill with tap water from nearby sink
4. Pour buckets and buckets of water into washing machine until at desired water level
5. Add laundry detergent and dirty clothes (whites first)
6. Laundry agitates for 15 minutes then remove it and place wet, soapy laundry into neighboring sink.
7. Plug the drain with a towel and fill with fresh water for rinsing
8. Rinse and squeeze each article of clothing
9. Place into spinner machine and spin clothes for 5 minutes until water is mostly rung out
10. Remove clothes from spinner, carry them in a bucket out to the backyard
11. Hang clothes on clothesline to dry
12. Repeat steps 4-11 for dark clothes
13. Repeat steps 4-11 for towels
14. Pray that it doesn't rain on your half-way dried clothes because now it's about noon and the rain will start in a couple hours
15. Once clothes are mostly dry on the sun-facing side, flip over so they can dry on the other side
16. When the raindrops start falling, yell "Oh crap!" and run into the back yard to pull all of your almost dry clothes off the outdoor line and put up again on the inside clothes lines
17. Once clothes are completely dry, remove from lines and place in large basket into the house for folding and distribution.
18. Phew! Go take a nap and dream that the Laundry Gods will one day bless you with an American style washer and dryer